Faithfulness. There are a lot of positive things I can say about my husband but whether we are are in the best of times or our worst of times, I am sure of one thing: he is faithful. Sometimes we think of being faithful in marriage as oh, we didn’t commit adultery. (Okay, so we have that, check.) But simply not cheating is not the goal. Faithfulness is not a checkbox of something you didn’t do but a position of your heart, what it is that you do, over and over, faithfully.
Here’s what Joe’s faithfulness looks like in our marriage, in honor of our 23rd wedding anniversary on June 14, 2020.
His heart is turned towards me. There isn’t a decision he makes where he doesn’t first think of how it will impact me.
He puts my wishes and well-being before his. He wants what is best for me. He asks my opinion on everything.
He is trustworthy. Even though he does make mistakes and doesn’t get it right every time, I know I can trust him. I never, ever want to take that for granted.
He shows up. Okay, sometimes he’s a just a little bit late LOL… but he always shows up. He’s there when I need him.
He honors me. Speaks only good about me. Joe has spoken so highly of me in his public platform that sometimes I wonder who is this girl he’s talking about? He takes every chance he has to make me feel loved and special.
He is honest. He says what he means and means what he says. No games played nor tolerated. He’s not afraid to speak the truth, or hear the truth.
He stands by me. He always makes sure I’m protected and taken care of. He never leaves me alone. He checks on me constantly, which I love.
He takes care of so many things for me, little and big. He’ll fix anything I ask him to fix the moment I ask him to fix it. (Okay, occasionally this is annoying so I always have to add, “you don’t have to do this right now” but it doesn’t matter, he can’t let it go unfixed.) He’ll Macguyver anything I need done and won’t quit til it’s to my liking.
His heart is pure. This doesn’t mean he’s perfect or he never sins but he chooses to not let darkness take a hold. He seeks God with abandon and strives to honor Him first. He apologizes when he needs to, forgives without delay. Although his heart has a lot of scars, he doesn’t hold on to bitterness.
He makes me a priority. He’s got a lot of people and things on his list these days, but he always lets me know I’m at the tippy top. He values and esteems me.
He is full of faith. He knows that Joe isn’t anything amazing but he only has what God has given him. His heart trusts in God no matter what is happening. He is faithful in making Christ the center of our marriage.
Bonus: as we practice this kind of faithfulness to each other, then there’s no crack for a cheating heart to sneak into. And Joe and I are diligent in checking our foundation for cracks regularly. Being on guard and aware for where the enemy wants to get a foothold in our marriage. That’s faithfulness. Being consistent. Trusting God and being trustworthy. Not just “not cheating” but working hard in every area of our marriage to keep the foundation strong.