Ever have one of those moments in your life or your marriage and you knew it was a moment? That what happened in that moment would determine the outcome of the argument, the direction of the relationship?
There have been many of those moments in our marriage. When we could have let it go either way.
In fact, you start going the wrong way. Your spouse is being selfish, completely unreasonable, and just plain exasperating. (And if you’re honest with yourself, you’re being selfish, unreasonable, and completely exasperating.)
You let the bitterness and resentment settle in until it feels comfortable and earned.
It feels so good to be right, you know? You let self-righteousness be the measure for your decisions and attitudes. The kind of self-righteousness that starts with BUT I.
Then God whispers to your heart, NOW.
Now is the time that all that stuff matters. That stuff you know about love, grace, forgiveness, patience, not keeping records of wrongs. That stuff is for now.
Love him now?
Well, when he is more lovable, I’ll consider loving him. For sure.
Forgiveness? Like he’d ever apologize. Maybe later.
Grace? So overrated.
We always have a choice in our attitudes. And if we choose to listen, God will point out those bad attitudes. His voice will cut through clear as day. Calling us to repentance, to die to self, surrender to Him.
The times our marriage has grown the most is when the only word that God has given us is NOW.
Sometimes it’s him, sometimes it’s me. Love goes first, is what I’ve heard.
Oh, we know the right thing to do, but then we all reach that moment where we want to say forget it. None of that applies to me. You don’t understand my husband. Just how clueless he is and that he just doesn’t get it.
But God says NOW. Love him now.
Love isn’t for the easy times. It’s most powerful in the hard times.
It’s for now.
The secret to a strong marriage? Old-fashioned non-glamourous obedience. When God is whispering to your heart- to take that first step. Be the first to let go of your stubbornness. Skip the snarkiness. Stop with the manipulation. Apologize first. Love him now.
Don’t miss your now.
But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves. For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man observing his natural face in a mirror; 24 for he observes himself, goes away, and immediately forgets what kind of man he was. James 1:22-24